How Do You Milk a Cow Chords & Lyrics by Cledus T. Judd
How Do You Milk a Cow
guitar chords lyrics
Parody of "How Do You Like Me Now" by Toby Keith (Toby Keith/Chuck Cannon) Tokeco
Tunes/Wacissa River Music (admin. by MRBI) (BMI)
New lyrics by Cledus T. Judd/Chris Clark, Cledus Crap Anthems (SESAC)/Of Music, Inc. (SESAC)
G(arpeggio)
Yeah I was always the lazy one,
G(arpeggio)
A Southern Californian,
F C
But I've got some kinfolk on the Mason-Dixon line.
G(arpeggio)
So this summer just for fun
G(arpeggio)
Hopped in my DeLorean
F C
And headed for my uncle's farm for a short time.
Dm Em F G
I thought that I would be huntin' and fishin'.
C F
I misunderstood him somehow.
Dm Em F G
So far there's nothin' but chores here to mention.
C F
I didn't mind feedin the sows.
F G
But HOW DO YOU MILK A COW?
C
How do you milk a cow?
F
I wasn't in FFA.
G
This cow must think i'm crazy
C
Up under it this way.
F C
I'm sittin' here a pullin', but there ain't nothin' comin' out.
G
Oh E I E I O,
C C F (play twice)
How do you milk a cow?
G(arpeggio)
Yeah I love it here in Tennesse,
G(arpeggio)
But these farmers all make fun of me.
F C
Can't haul much hay in a tiny sports car.
G(arpeggio)
So I got myself a 4 wheel drive,
G(arpeggio)
Learned to spotlight deer at night,
F C
And I've got shearin' sheep right down to an art.
Dm Em
One thing's for sure,
F G
I hate shovelin' manure,
C F
It gets all over my overalls.
Dm Em
Them horses need shoein'
F G
I hear Bessie mooin'.
C F
So I thought maybe I'd ask you all.
F G
HOW DO YOU MILK A COW?
C
How do you milk a cow?
F
I think it's safe to say
G C
A man could get arrested for this stuff in LA
F C
This heifer must be empty 'cause she ain't puttin out.
G
Oh E I E I O,
C
Tell me how do you milk a cow.
(solo)
(Spoken)
This song is absolutely an "udder" disaster.
I hope I don't get mad cow diease.
C
How do you milk a cow?
F
I no longer care.
G C
I'm gettin sick and tired of smellin' dairy air.
F
I'm headin' back to Cali
C
And I'm turnin' in my plow.
G
Oh E I E I O.
C C F (fade)
How do you milk a cow?
